Most people struggle to reach their goals, their dreams and vision for their life. They don’t understand the process and they don’t keep their agreements to themselves. You may be asking “why”? The answer is simple. They don’t want to be uncomfortable.
I have worked with clients that while we were talking about what they had to do to reach their goal would actually say “I don’t want to do that, it will make me uncomfortable”.
You have to get out of your comfort zone to achieve anything in life.
Discomfort is one of the values of commitments, one of the very reasons for making a commitment in the first place. We have a goal-fulfillment mechanism built in us. When you commit to something, you are telling that mechanism “I want this”. The mechanism says “Cool, I’ll arrange that.” And it does.
Your goal-fulfillment mechanism can:
- See what lessons you need to learn to achieve your goal and arranges those lessons. These lessons can easy – you notice an article in a magazine, have a conversation with a friend that reveals something you had seen about yourself, or even a song. Other times, the lessons aren’t pleasant at all – a boss has to reprimand you, you get sick and the doctor has to tell you to change your lifestyle or you will die or the you lose someone special before you made things right.
- See what stands in your way of your goals and removes it. Again, it can be pleasant – you want a new vehicle and someone makes you a really good deal on your current vehicle, or unpleasant – someone steals your current vehicle.
As I stated earlier, you have to expand your comfort zone to include your goals. The bigger the goal, the more you must expand your comfort zone. You expand your comfort zone by doing uncomfortable things until they become comfortable.
People use discomfort to stay in their comfort zone and they don’t reach their goals. To reach your goals and to grow, you must learn to deal positively with discomfort.
This process of growth is known as “grist for the mill”. Think about how flour used to be made in an old stone mill. The workers would add gravel (grist) to the wheat before grinding it. The grist rub against the wheat as the mill wheel passes over. This friction causes the wheat to be ground into the fine powder, which is the flour. If it wasn’t for the grist, the wheat would only be crushed.
Are you adding grist to the mill?